The Real Struggle: Why After School Programs and Daycares Find It Tough Supporting Neurodivergent Kids (and Their Parents)

If you’ve ever worked in an after school program or daycare, you’ll know it’s no walk in the park. Throw a few neurodivergent kids, like those with ADHD, autism, or sensory processing differences into the mix, and things can get even trickier. While these environments can be brilliant for helping kids burn off energy, build social skills, and discover their strengths, the reality is that most services are still playing catch-up when it comes to true inclusion and support.

Juggling Needs: It’s Not Just About “Managing Behaviour”

Let’s be honest: most after school and childcare staff are doing their absolute best. But with tight staff-to-kid ratios, limited time for training, and a mountain of admin, it’s easy for neurodivergent kids to fall through the cracks. When you’ve got 25 kids in a room, it’s tough to give anyone the one-on-one attention they might need, especially a child who’s melting down because the noise is too much, or who’s darting from activity to activity because their brain just won’t slow down.

Often, staff haven’t had much (or any) specific training in neurodiversity. That means behaviours like fidgeting, zoning out, or even clinging to a favourite toy can be misread as “attention-seeking” or “bad behaviour” rather than signs of overwhelm or a need for support. The result? Neurodivergent kids might get excluded from group activities, or even labelled as “difficult,” which only makes things harder for everyone.

Activities That Work—And Why It’s Not One Size Fits All

The good news is, some activities really do help kids with ADHD and other neurodivergent traits thrive. Creative outlets like art, drama, and dance let kids express themselves, burn energy, and build confidence in a way that feels natural and fun. Outdoor play is a lifesaver for many, giving kids space to move, explore, and reset.

But here’s the catch: what works for one child might be a disaster for another. Some kids love the buzz of a group game; others need quiet corners and solo time to recharge. And while structure and routine are essential, too much rigidity can backfire. It’s a constant balancing act, and without the right resources, staff can feel like they’re always two steps behind.

The Parent Factor: Communication and Conflict

It’s not just the kids who need support—parents of neurodivergent children are often running on empty themselves. Many have already faced years of judgement, exclusion, and well-meaning but useless advice. When they drop their child off at after school care or daycare, they’re hoping for understanding, safety, and maybe even a bit of respite.

But miscommunication can quickly turn things sour. If a child’s needs aren’t met, or if behaviour is misunderstood, parents can feel blamed or dismissed. On the flip side, educators might feel overwhelmed by parent expectations or unsure how to explain what’s happening in the group setting. It’s a recipe for frustration on both sides.

Systemic Challenges: Why the Sector Is Struggling

A big part of the problem is that the system itself isn’t set up for true inclusion. There’s no mandatory standard for neurodiversity training, and inclusion isn’t even monitored under the National Quality Standard for early childhood education. Most centres are just trying to meet the basics to keep things running, and that means “just enough” support rather than what’s actually needed.

Low pay, high staff turnover, and a lack of ongoing professional development make it even harder to build the kind of skilled, stable teams that neurodivergent kids (and their families) need. The Productivity Commission has called for better inclusion support and training, but we’re not there yet.

What Actually Helps?

Despite all the challenges, there are some bright spots. Programs that offer structure, clear routines, and flexibility, plus creative or movement-based activities, can make a real difference. Regular feedback, visual cues, and opportunities for kids to move or take breaks are all proven strategies. Most importantly, staff who are patient, open to learning, and willing to collaborate with parents can turn things around for neurodivergent kids.

The Bottom Line

Supporting kids with ADHD and other neurodivergent traits in after school and daycare settings isn’t easy. It takes time, training, empathy, and a willingness to try new things—and, let’s be honest, a lot more resources than most centres currently have. But with the right support and a genuine commitment to inclusion, these programs can become places where every kid (and every parent) feels seen, supported, and able to thrive.

If you’re running an after school program or daycare and want your leaders and teams to feel more confident and equipped to support neurodivergent kids, reach out to Willful Steps. We offer practical, evidence-based training tailored to your needs—helping you build a more inclusive, supportive environment for every child and family.

Let’s work together to make inclusion more than just a buzzword. Contact Willful Steps today to find out how we can help your team take the next step.